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Thursday, October 14th, 2004

Time:1:20 pm.
Roommate of the Month Club Hall of Fame:

Who else is going down?
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Friday, October 8th, 2004

Time:7:25 am.
Help mark my, um, triumphant return to the south by joining me to watch the best band around, the King Cobra (with Rachel Carns from the Need on drums). Two weeks from today, Friday Oct. 22, at Blanaca's Pyro Room. Brit's band is opening up so you can see him there too. I need as many people as I can there so I can put on more good shows in Kansas City. Bring your friends and single women.
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Tuesday, September 14th, 2004

Time:2:41 am.
Goth night at the gay bar.

Wouldn't you know that Marylin Manson would be played. But how surprising was it that both Siouxsie and Thrill Kill kult were played? Some guy in a Motley Crue cover band tried talking to me. he was Nikki Sixx, but without the cool tattoos. I'm redefining Minnesota Nice tonight, it equals flaky. Flaky, but with glitters.
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Friday, September 10th, 2004

Subject:my best ideas of the summer
Time:1:22 pm.
The penis cozy-A crocheted knit (to allow room for expansion) penis/ strap-on holder that ties around the waist and under the underwear (you know, if you wear that kind of thing. Benefits, providing maximum security for the penis/ strap-on and much needed warmth during the winter months of Minnesota. Also adds that much needed "cuteness" to they appendage known as the "penis/ strap-on" by making it better accessorized and all in all more appealing. Possibly scented?

Whiskey infused beer (aka brewisky)-for those of us who just can't get drunk fast enough. I got this idea once at the bar when I was really annoyed with the time I wasted by having to drink a shot and then a beer and at the expense that would add up in doing so. Admit drinkers, after awhile plain old beer just doesn't cut it (and it just gets pissed out) but straight liquor is too much to pound all the time. I feeling is that if it worked for Reeses Peanut Butter cups it has unlimited potental, especially in the college market were both are consumed in massive quantities. Mmmm, PBeamR, Old Milwaukee Crow.

Snatch pants- so there are these things in town called "snatch sacks" which are basically triangles of fur made into a purse. Well, my improvement is this. Basically you take a triangle of fur sew on the crotch of your pants, with a pink zipper of course. Viola, instant sexual objectification of women or simply more visual approach to feminism in a mans world. Who cares, it's a great conversational starting/ walking pick-up line with the perfect accessory already made.

Peg leg pants- All right, you take a pair of black levi's and on the bottom right leg you insert a hollow peg leg to fit you real leg through. Yeah, I know it sounds dumb, but if you already have the jolly roger flag, the jolly roger shirt, might as well go all the way with the piratecore and get the jolly roger pants. What better excuse to limp and go argh?

Belt buckle bracelets- because indie hipsters are still lovin' the white trash look
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Thursday, September 2nd, 2004

Time:8:46 pm.
Funny things I saw at the Minnesota State Fair

Larger than life human heads sculpted of butter
People in animal costumes break dancing
Macaroni on-a-stick
Female lumberjacks that creepily turned me on
The Magnum PI tilt-a-whirl, not a replica
Pizza on-a-stick
Deep fried candy bars-on-a-stick
A cow starting to piss while Derek was starting to pet it (maybe you had to be there for that one)
Reggie, the Republican voting registration rig that kick us off
Waffles on-a-stick
Prince's head made entirely out of farm seed
People eating chicken on-a-stick while looking at live poultry
A harden cows stomach
Fried pickles on-a-stick
Tacos on-a-stick
The Allman Brothers
When they say that this is the great Minnesota Get Together, they're not fucking kidding. This was the largest collection of people in wheelchairs, soccer moms, white trash 8-year-olds, crusty punks, hot black lesbian couples, amputees, republicans, anti-walmart union workers, hot topic goths, carnies, future carnies, frat boys, indie rockers, and old guys with beer guts that I've ever seen. I don't even know anyone in this town and I ran into 10 different people.
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Friday, August 13th, 2004

Subject:I am going to try to write this in the voice of Sarah Steele
Time:4:26 pm.
So, yeah, I just got back from Ladyfest Bay-side/ Homo-a-gogo. It was fun. We went on a road trip. It took about 3 weeks. We saw about 1/5 of the country. Let me just say that it was amazing. People everywhere were sweet as can be and the mountains were so fucking beautiful. Courtney and I got to meet Lynne Breedlove and Kaia Wilson, oh, and Rachel Carns. The music was awesome. The Hot Behind You, Veronica Lip Gloss and the Evil Eyes, Shoplifting, The Gossip, Tracy and the Plastics, reunited Team Dresch? All fucking great. Even Addicted 2 Fiction was good. Oh, Nomy Lamm, could you be any better? And can I suggest to you that it would be in your best interest not to miss the King Cobra the next time they come to your town?
The spoken word was fantastic and the films even better. We saw this awesome guy dress up like Peter Pan and dance like Micheal Jackson to the PYT video. Courtney got this huge crush on him and preceded to giggle like a school girl whenever he was around. Now all her friends are confused on her sexuality, but really this is the prettiest boy (FTM) ever.
Oh, Olympia, your soy milk lattes I will miss. The Brotherhood? It has shuffleboard. That organic restaurant/ show space where the hot bike punk girls hang out? It has really good fries. Let's not forget the one and only homo bar in Oly were you can dance on the same floor with the Legends of Kill Rock Stars and shoot pool with your favorite queercore drummer. Sorry about getting wasted in your house and making too much noise on the bed in the kitchen. I owe you a couple of beers.
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Wednesday, July 21st, 2004

Subject:I blame Sarah...
Time:11:06 pm.
Since I've been officially addicted to friendster (Did you know I'm within 2 degrees of Rachel Carns. Well I'm pleased.)
for this past month or so I figure it's high to quit ignoring my lonely, lowly live journal account. Even if Brit is the only person I still actually know on here. (PS I'm still sad you didn't see me in Minneapolis. I was going to you to Dillenger 4's bar, the one that all the fashion punks hang out at. You would have gotten laid there for sure.)
Anyway, this summer has thoroughly kicked my ass. Since interning at my roommates booking agency, thus completing the circle of doing every shit job in rock'n'roll, I've come to the scary conclusion that the music industry might actually be kind of boring. The movie theater has REALLY gone downhill since the union got voted down and the girl with a really great smile that melts my little heart is moving to Brooklyn before we even got a chance to make-out, or least have her turn down the offer to make-out with me. The radio station still has me logging cds in the data base with no hopes of a radio show anytime in the future. (My 3 new redio show ideas: "The Outlaw Cowgirl Show" rebel Americana and criminal country, "Ham on Rye Radio" experimental spoken word ala Kathy Acker/ Sue P Fox mixed post-punk and no-wave bands from 80's NYC, "The Anarchist Dance Hour" self-explanatory although I will cringe whenever I have to play the new corporate Le Tigre.) Hotel work continues to suck away at my very soul, still it is the best paying job I've ever had and will probably ever get (up to hooker money on good days if I count in tips and tax free!). At the desk yesterday I checked out Mr. Har Mar Superstar and he fucking snubbed my ass. Probably because he knows he still owes me $20.
I leave for my massive West Coast ride in a few days. I know I should be excited to spend 2 weeks in a car with Courtney seeing ever hot dyke and tranny in band ever, but my stomach is knots. Courtney jinx the whole damn thing by telling me about this "bad feeling" she got heading out. What the fuck? The last thing I need is my co-pilot on a 2+ week roadtrip across the country on little to no money, no place stay and no map to tell me that this might be a bad idea. We're going to see Team Dresch, damn it! King Cobra! If I'm lucky, girl pirates and bike punks. Why do I feel so nervous about all this?
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Saturday, May 29th, 2004

Subject:Thinking about Bryon, yeah, I miss him
Time:2:14 am.
On a very sad note (aside the one about B.C.) the union vote for the area Landmark Theaters vetoed by 20 to 13. ::fists pounds down:: Fucking bullshit! Some dumb corporate lawyers got to all of these assholes and now we're still stuck at a $7.25 an hour salary cap, no benefits and no full time hours. Arggh! I don't even want to talk about it again, and unfortunately can't until next year. I thought that this was a city of anarchists and communists damn it.
Never the less, I've subsided my anger with graphically violent video games, notably Def Jam Vendetta were I can choke-hold mutha fuckas as Method Man, Red Man, or Ludacris to my liking.
This is unreasonably satisfying.
In other news my cat decided to come home today, but only because it was raining outside. It's the third time this indoor cat has gone out in 2 months, which is safe to say he doesn't like it here yet.
It's understandable, the rats in the wall are trying to get at him.
Jucifer is playing the main room at the First Ave with All the Pretty Horse next Friday (June 4th), wanna go?
So ends another week of vegetarian eating, bike-riding, non-hair washing Minneapolis lifestyle.
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Sunday, May 16th, 2004

Time:3:37 am.
Blah, blah, blah. I haven't updated in here for quite some time, but as my neglected and lonely cat will tell I've been very busy. Three jobs, a volunteer stint and classes to boot will eat away at a lot of energy. Needless to say I am tired and should be sleeping, yet, I am drunk, awake and at a loss for late night phone buddies. So here goes...
(Points to be noted)
1. One of my many low paying jobs is working at the Landmark Theaters. Maybe you've heard about them since they've been eating away at independent movie houses since the 1970's and claim to show "independent cinema" when, in all actuality, it only shows IFC, Sony Cinema Classics, HBO Films, etc.
Q: Why do I work there?
A: Have you ever seen the job market for Minneapolis? It's like it doesn't even exist. I had an in at this this place and it's the only way I would have been hired. In the 7 months that I've been selling popcorn and cleaning gum underneath seats I've already capped out at the wage maximum of $7.25 an hour. This is 45 more cents (I only write this out because I can't even find a cents key on this computer) more an hour then the employees at the Lagoon and Uptown make, and let me spell this out, SIX DOLLARS AND EIGHTY CENTS AN HOUR IS THE MOST AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU CAN MAKE as an employee these theaters. The last time I made that little amount of money was when I was 16 and still worked two jobs to get by. Needless to say, we've decide to form a union to raise working conditions. So, if you live in the twin cities area and agree that a wage cap is bullshit please sign our petition at any radical protest, outside of the midnight movies at the Uptown, or the at the table at the Flaming Film Festival. There's nearly 700 signatures so far but we could always use more.
2. I will at the end of this week be officially certified as a board operator for KFAI FM Community Radio. So if anyone has a show that they need to be covered let me now. Also my next radio show that I'm planning is a post-punk/ no wave/ spoken word show and/ or alt country program and any submissions will be welcomed. Queer punk will be especially noted but not necessary.
3. I've also started booking bands around the country and am always looking for local acts to fill nation headline tours, so if you're in a band that plays, notably, metal, rock, alt-country or indie email allforshow.com.
4. Is any looking for a ride share to homo-a-go-go this year? I've got one car and 4 more asses that I can fill in it. Plus I've got the hookup and the hotel usage.
Such a long update for so little time. I must say that I am sadden by the fact that I have yet to fuck a recent collage graduate; yet, but am looking forward to the opportunity for some heavy sex and hot conversion. Hint, Hint.
Anyhow, the Flaming Film Festival is still going on today. If you want to support truly independent film and live in the Minneapolis area go check it out. Intermedia Arts, 28 and Lyndale.
I miss my Kansas City friends who never call me.
If you live in Minneapolis I have the new Kid In the Hall dvd, you should come over and watch it.
The end
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Tuesday, May 11th, 2004

Subject:Mix Tape for Adam #1
Time:11:26 am.
Side A
Beta Band: Squares
The Faint: Agenda Suicide
Blonde Redhead: En Particulier
Numbers: We Like Having These Things (live)
International (Noise) Conspiracy: Only 2 Lovers
Mike Gunther: Have Mercy
The Gits: Seaweed
Neko Case: Knock Loud
Television: Marquee Moon
Sonic Youth: Swimsuit Issue
'Mats: Can't hardly Wait

Side B
Bonfire Madigan: 88 Arbitrary Configurations
Flin Flon: Red Deer
Aislers Set: Catherine Says
DJ Shadow: Organ Donor
American Analog Set: I'm the Postman
Beat Happening: Bewitched
Causey Way: People of the World
Dog Faced Hermans: Jan 9
Trans Am: The Campaign
Siouxsie and the Banshees: Helter Skelter (peel session)
April March: Charlatan
Elani Mandel: Dream Boat
My Bloody Valentine

also known as the Minneapolis hipster tape
email me if you want a copy
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Sunday, August 17th, 2003

Subject:Get a new lease on life
Time:10:02 pm.
So far the jobs that I have found on the paper that I could actually qualified for are as follows:
A bartending job at a place that wouldn't leave their name in the paper (my secret hope is that it's a gangster hangout like the one Bart Simpson worked at)
A hostess job at a place called Babalu's (Ricky Riccardo, I Love Lucy, c'mon)
A repo man (best movie ever)
Shinder's (adult book store that sells baseball cards and Dungeons and Dragons accessories)
Cocktail waitress at Sheik's (Minneapolis' finest strip club)
A role in b-movie horror film (because I missed my chance in Zombie Bloodbath 3)
A medical guinea pig testing the effects of smoking on menstruating
and 2 independent record chains that require resumes for a $6 an hour job that hasn't given me a call back

It's been said before but I'll say it again the job market sucks. Even the plasma center has lowered the amount of money that they pay donors because they have a "surplus on inventory". So either there's a lack of sick people who need blood products to live or there's just that many people willing to have a huge needle stuck in them sucking out their life-force for 3 hours at $15 a pop. On the bright side Emma and Kate are leaving for Texas today giving me a week to myself. The Epoxies play on Thursday, I have a bottle of Old Crow and my hair looks fucking nice. Good times
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Monday, July 21st, 2003

Time:7:50 am.
I went skinny dipping the other night with Emma and her girlfriend. Well, I was the only one who did any swimming, they just kind of laughed at me. Never the less, it was nice to get out of the house. There's been so many strangers coming in and out of here lately that it feel like a youth hostile. I found one kid sleeping in the living room this morning who turned out to be from Kansas City. I was surprised that I didn't know him since I know 2 out every 3 people in KC, but he was just a squatter island kid. Not the same crowd.
I got an email response from Nicole regarding my turning down the chances of us ever "hooking up" but we should stay friends. It just went "hahahahaha", and then she left her phone number and said that I should come up for market days. Is that a good or bad sign?
It doesn't really matter because I'm more worried about Jim losing his job at Meiners. From what I hear there's a hiring freeze in Kansas City, just like everywhere else. Hopefully this will give him the motivation to get his GED (nudge, nudge). I don't want to have to get all Mr. T on his ass. I don't have time for that shit. I have Strangers With Candy to watch, mac and cheese to eat, and finally, a house all to myself.
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Wednesday, July 9th, 2003

Time:8:50 pm.
Mood: lethargic.
It's true what they say, Minneapolis is the Midwestern version of Seattle. Hip, young, expensive, coffee shops on every corner, and rain. Lots of rain. The main difference between Seattle rain and Minneapolis rain is the tornado warnings. There's been one almost every week since summer started, more then I've ever seen in my life and I'm from Kansas. So I'm stuck inside the house again, which is good since I'm flat broke from my Kansas City visit. The trip that I'm still sobering up from. Hopefully the girls made it home all right since I haven't heard from any of them. Nor from Grant, which is weird because he's suppose to be coming up here in a month and he never misses a chance for a 4AM phone call. If it wasn't for Brit I'd think a tornado stuck Kansas City again.
Still raining outside. Time to finish off the whiskey and finish up cleaning the house.
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Thursday, January 30th, 2003

Time:4:18 am.
Sang my first round at the art school karaoke bar the other night. Three rounds, but on Joan Jett's "I Love Rock and Roll" the entire bar jumped on stage to sing along. Mother fuckers grabbing the microphone right out of hand to sing. Further proof that Joan Jett is the source for world peace.
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Sunday, December 22nd, 2002

Subject:not dead yet...
Time:8:54 pm.
The mix tapes I'm giving out as christmas presents-
Kids In America-The Muffs
I Live Off You-X Ray Spex
whatshisnamehearts-The Frumpies
Arkansas Heat-The Gossip
Game Song-Tuscadero
Tony's Theme-The Pixies
Machine-Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Pretend We're Dead-L7
Tongue Tied-Errase Errata
Crazy Homicide-The Avengers
VR-Cold Cold Hearts
Beat My Guest-The Epoxies
Say You're a Scream-Four Corners
Tip City-The Amps
Love Songs are for Losers-Crowns On 45
Not Another Other Woman-Carolyn Mark
Fuck and Run-Liz Phair
Seasons in the Sun-Black Box Recorder
side 2
Cherry Bomb-Bratmobile
Talk Potty-The NEED
Sippin 40z-Gravy Train
I Wanna Have Some Fun-Samantha Fox
Punch Me in the Face-Selby Tigers
HARMAR-Har Mar Superstar (with Beth Ditto)
He's My Thing-Babes In Toyland
Dubious-Kicking Giant
Fussin'-Juliet Swango
Train Wreck-Bangs
Upper Fury-Flin Flon
It's Over-The Butchies
Queens of Noise-The Runaways
Favorite Fool-Rex Hobart and his Misery Boys
Les and Ray-Le Tigre

Radio Song-Hot Rod Circuit
What Do I Get-Buzzcocks
Sentimental Man-Dismemberment Plan
Chicken With It's Head Cut Off-Magnetic Fields
You Ain't No Big Thing-Holly Golightly
Letter From an Occupant-New Pornographers
Buddy Holly Convention-The Smugglers
SOS-Meat Purveyors
A+B-Luxo Champ
Skin of Another Man-Prima Donnas
Scary Monsters-Superchunk
Need You Around-Smoking Popes
Should have Gone By Now-Rex Hobart and his Misery Boys
side 2
Double Date-Sean Na Na
6'1"-Liz Phair
Long Distance Drunk-Modest Mouse
Silly-Go Sailor
Big Decision-Elliot Smith
Makes No Sense At All-Husker Du
Summer Time-Four Corners
Why I Try to Look So Bad-Comet Gain
Forgottan Favorite-Velocity Girl
Speakers Push Thru Air-Pretty Girls Make Graves
Whip the Blankets-Neko Case
No Respect-Newtown Neurotics
Cat Walk-Beat Happening
She's Leaving Town-Corn Sisters

New Day Rising & Flip Your Whip-Husker Du
side 2
Please to Meet Me & Tim-The Replacements

Child of the late 80's/ early 90's? How'd you guess?

Brit gets nothing but Jim gets a subscription to a gay porno mag so he can be embarrassed every time he sees his mail man. Keeping true to our atheist upbringing my mother, sister and I agreed not to buy presents for each other. Total spent on this holiday $18.

I'm officially moving to Minneapolis as soon as Emma gets back from Japan. So if anyone wants to by some cds, books or a big screen tv from me give me a call.
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Sunday, September 15th, 2002

Time:3:52 am.
Mood:too good to be true.
On the bus, that's where we're ridin'
On the bus, O.K., don't say hi, then
Your tongue, your transfer,
your hand, your answer

On the bus, everyone's lookin' for it
On the bus, I am lookin' for it
And everything ain't O.K.
I might die before Monday
They're all watchin' us

Kiss me on the bus
Kiss me on the bus
If you knew how I felt now
You wouldn't act so adult now
Hurry, hurry, here comes my stop

On the bus, watch our reflection
On the bus, I can't stand no rejection
C'mon, let's make a scene
Oh, baby, don't be so mean
They're all watchin' us
Kiss me on the bus
Kiss me on the bus
If you knew how I felt now
You wouldn't act so adult now
Hurry, hurry, here comes my stop
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Thursday, September 12th, 2002

Time:2:51 am.
I don't know why I go out at all. All of my smart friends have figured out that it's just a waste of time and money, even though I didn't have to pay for anything tonight. Ha, Brit, now I am the rock star.
After yet another night of going to a show were only 30 kids showed up Ashlie and I went to Buzzard Beach in our matching French 1960s beatnik outfits because we are the walking and talking version of the Patty Duke Show. And if run-on sentences weren't bad enough I ran into my crush, the camel girl. Actually she ran into me by default because we were sitting at a table with one of her friends. I mistakenly told said friend that I about my huge crush on her. I even went so far as to relay the embarrassing story about when I tried to hit on her while getting my free smokes and my fly was unzipped the whole time. Oh god, bourbon is bad for me.
Well the camel girl must of had a homing device of some kind on her because she immediately came back with some randum guy and precedded to make out with him in front of me and the rest of the table the entire the night. Not just any kind of making out mind you, the kind were hands are roaming underneath shirts, loud slurping noises are made and there is nothing that anyone in a ten foot area can do to avoid watching it. A fucking train wreck I tell you. Her god damn tongue was in his ear cleaning it out like a q-tip!
Needless to say I am once again crushless in Kansas City. Which is fine. It's my birthday in a week. I'll be 23 and too old to deal with this bullshit. I'll finally quit my shitty job and dive into corporate land head first. If I don't crack my open and die of from lack of blood then I have some sort of brain damage that allow me to be able to handle myself better in the world. Or I'll stay a drunk because, god help it, it's just so damn fun.
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Wednesday, September 11th, 2002

Time:3:12 am.
So I went to go see the Vibrators show tonight, actually I went to go see Amys new band open up for the Vibrators, but fuck her and her snobby fucking attitude. Anyway. Does it bother anyone else that these 50 plus year old guys with balding heads and haggard faces are still singing "girl you really make me hot" and "when I see a girl I think sex object"? Yes, the Vibrators are an original punk band, playing since before Jim or myself were even born.
Yes, these songs are meant to be tongue and cheek but the girls they're singing to in the audience are no more than 17. Maybe I've just been forced to listen to Bikini Kill too much lately or I'm still in a shitty mood from being constantly blown off tonight but I'm a little sicken by it.
Granted I'll most likely be doing the same thing when I'm 50. I'll be down at liquor store buying beer for underage girls and seeing if they wanna come on over to my house and drink it with me. "I've got a kick ass record collection, baby. What do ya say?" Of course, that will be me and I will not a balding, wrinkled 50 year old guy. I will be a white haired, halter top wearing, no class bar fly with too much make-up on and I'm looking forward to it.
Comments: Add Your Own.

Thursday, September 5th, 2002

Subject:102nd post
Time:3:19 am.
I can't believe I lost two drinks on question over the Coen Brothers. Who knew they directed The Hudsucker Proxy? That movie didn't even have John Turturro or John Goodman in it. Wouldn't that mean that it doesn't count?
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Tuesday, August 27th, 2002

Subject:Thing that I never thought I'd be saying
Time:12:16 am.
I just got back into to town from a skinhead wedding in Iowa. Held at the Music Man Square no less. Yes, that's right, a whole conference center made to look like the town that the Music Man was set in. Because Mason City is the original River City, in case you didn't know.
Fake stores selling period musical instruments, old time barber shops and barber-poles, street lamps and park benches lined the sidewalk so you might get the feeling like you were walking around a turn of the century town square. (Magical.) There was even a fake River City High School Gymnasium that was used for the reception. Dustin and Sandy (aka the skinheads) used the the white picket fence house as the alter for the wedding vows. Poetic or ironic? They also used a female minister and a guy who looked liked, and more awful, sounded like that Will Farrell character who plays at the school dance. But, it was an Irish ceremony so at least it was short and sweet. Leaves more time for drinking.
Who wants to get drunk at the Days Inn in Mason City Iowa? I do! I do!
Who wants to beer bong two Bud Lights at one time? I do! I do!
By far the wackiest wedding I've ever been too.
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